Jun 26, 2014

Life update, I missed you!

Good day everyone, how long has it been since the last time I shared you my life update? Soooo many things had happened I barely have time to update my dear little bloglette. Also, most of my bloggy friends are so busy to update too so it seems more quiet here in the blogsphere lately. I gotta do some more blog-walking so I can meet more new friends. People, wait for me!

Anyone noticed I changed my layout a little? I want to revamp this blog but I guess things are happening slowly, well.. one step at a time, I guess? How do you like it so far? Is the title too pale? Can you actually see it? I wanted to make something watercolor-ish because that's what I've been doing lately with my artworks. I also want to restart my artwork little shop, it's been idle somehow :( but I promise I will force myself to create artworks from time to time. Because there's no such thing as not enough time, it's just a matter of priority, right?

I missed doing a lot of things I used to do now that I've found myself a job. The job itself isn't so hard and also kind of fun. I've landed myself as a visual content in a fashion retail company, how does that sound? Nice, right? It is. But honestly speaking, I need a lot more than the company pay to fulfill my heaps of needs of clothes and make up and gadgets (lol). More importantly, my passion towards art and creating stuff is still alive and kicking and it's not going anywhere anytime soon. I want to keep it alive, I have to keep it alive. While the work I do in the office is somehow artsy, it is still not enough. So here I am reliving the littletiara artwork line. I'm thinking of changing the brand 'littletiara' to my name, tiararisa. How do you like it? (I wonder if anyone is even reading this post, lol).

So how's life been treating me? So-so. I'm still on my training days until next month. I'm honestly still thinking if I was meant to be here, I like the job, but it doesn't bring the most of me, that must be why I keep on seeking of time to create artworks. Sadly, sometimes I'm too tired (and lazy) to do anything when I got back from work. But now, I will promise myself not to be too lazy anymore. You know the feeling of not doing enough? Funnily it's not for my boss because they all seem satisfied with my work, it's not doing enough for myself, because I know what I'm capable of but I'm not doing enough to let them shine.

I watched 2NE1's concert! (Okay, this is so OOT but whatever, lol I will find a way to connect it). It was super cool. Super crazy, everything was amazing but the most remarkable for me, other than the super cool lighting and stage was the performance of 2NE1's leader CL. I just have to talk about it! She seems sooooo very happy to be on stage, it was like she was born to perform. Her smile was so wide and it shows how proud and happy and satisfied she was to perform in front of us. I want to be like her, to be genuinely happy doing what she likes best. Of course, all of the girls were stunning and adorable, too!

I miss the happy feeling of finishing my artworks, and someone ordered it and received it and show it off to their friends and colleagues. It wasn't much, but to create something useful to make someone's day brighter, isn't that a really nice feeling? No wonder CL looks really happy, the energy of her fans that filled the arena transferred to her and her team. We were all really happy to be able to share the same place with 2NE1, the happy energy, how huge it must be?

Also, I miss speaking English T^T this sounds so weird, right? So other than creating graphics and visuals for my company website, I also contribute in writing some blog-content. But they're all written in Bahasa. And I can't find anyone who can converse English here with me T^T. I'm afraid  my English is becoming dull, so I figured that means I have to write more english, right? To keep my actively speaking English. I know I know this sounds so weird, I myself didn't think there would be a day I would complain about the lack of speaking English in my life ever, lol.

Other than working and watching a super-exciting concert, trying to create more artwork and struggling to keep speaking English, life's beeen normal. I've been purchasing lots of make ups (lol), and I plan to review them soon. Most of them are Korean products (like of course) but I also purchased an NYX lip cream, and a japanese mascara. So yeah, lots of things to talk about, eh? ;)

I missed you  guys, I hope you missed me too (heheh...) I will try to update more frequently! Ah, wish me luck with everything!

Jun 4, 2014

it's been an honor loving you

I am always someone who loves being in love, who loves loving. For me, being in love is a pleasure, a happy journey, and exciting adventure. Whenever I decided to be in love, I know the risk and tried my best to only fall for the ones worthy enough. But of course, love is love and it's as unexpected and unplanned as it is. And when I got my heart broken, or falling out of love I remind myself that I chanced it upon myself, that it was always good while it lasted, that it had brought so many smiles upon myself, that no matter how short it was, it gave me happiness and let me know someone better than I thought I would.

Being in love is never a bad thing, even during the confusing time, even when I'm crying because of it, even when a relationship ends, even when it's an unrequited love, being in love is never a bad thing. The lesson learnt, the memories captured, the happiness within, everything would only be there when I am in love.

Being in love scares me, because it is beautiful and mind-blowing and overwhelming and exciting and everything. Because being in love brought me all the feelings and emotions I wouldn't experience when I am not in love. How many times have I fallen in love? I can't even tell because honestly I've lost count of it. How many times have I fallen out of love or got my heart broken? I'll never be able to tell because of course, I don't know... why would I keep track on such sad occasion?

It's been an honor loving you. The fact that I love you is a proof enough how wonderful you are at least to me. How you got me smiling ear to ear and maybe even invaded my dreams shows how great of a person you are, how you've brought me happiness no matter how small.

So here I am thanking you, you, and you. For the happy times, for the memories, for the smiles, for the fun midnight chats, for the red blush on my cheeks, for smelling good on our dates, for the silly selfies, for the warm hugs, for the tickling little kisses, for everything, thank you for letting me love you, it's been an honor loving you.
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