Where am I?

In less than 24 hours I will be graduated, a certified MBA completed with the Toga and the graduation ceremony (including waking up super early in the morning to get the make up done). Since this is the second time I graduated, it feels less thrilling. And a bigger responsibility come with this, I'm in yet another life gate and so what's next? 

It certainly feels like a deja vu, I've experienced this two years ago when I got my Bachelor. I'm out of school, and another road called 'REAL LIFE' is spread out wide in front of me, with so many options with the responsibilities and risks; and most importantly, no U-turn, no coming back.

Which is hella scary.

Sometime this morning when my mom was reading the invitation for the Gala dinner she said "so it's time for you to start looking for a job" and I can't agree more, but what I had in mind was "Oh, but I've bought a ticket to Korea instead."

Is this a bad thing? I certainly don't think so, I might be wrong but this is what I believe; I'm living my life, while I'm still young and have lots of free time. I need to enjoy life before I start my career (more likely, my 9-5 life). That's my argument, but of course I can see my mom opposing to it, probably thinking I'm wasting my time (well I might be), but I hope to find more than just the pleasure of vacationing, I wish to discover more of myself.

I'm a serious contradiction of myself, I'm both this and that, I know everyone feels so about themselves too. In my case, I'm so contradicted that I confuse myself. It somehow feels like I'm not doing a good job of being me. 

Everyone knows me as the cute girl next door, a girl with a bright smile and positive thoughts, which I actually am. But I feel them cringing when discovering about the other side of me, the one that actually pretty naughty and wild, and because of that, I restrain from doing so, but that makes me feel bad about myself and makes me want to run away and disappear.

What's with all the social pressure that I have to get a job and get married after I finish school? Sure I want to do that, but there's something bugging me. Am I getting a job and getting married because other people do so? Am I getting a job because I need money? Or am I getting a job to prove that I am capable of something? Am I getting a job to use my full potential to earn for living? Am I getting married to show people that I, too, can find a guy and be loved? Am I getting married so I can have a huge party? Am I getting married because I'm in love? And what is love indeed? There are so many reasons, and some of them aren't supposed to be reasons of getting a job and married. 

It's not like I don't need money, or don't want to get married, because I do! I certainly do! The shopaholic here is in constant need of money to buy all the make up and new clothes and shoes and even tickets. The helpless romantic in me is dying to wear a wedding dress and staring at the eyes of the one I love while saying the vow to last forever and actually doing what I've promised to do (to last forever).

But I need to sort things out first, finding answers to my own questions, starting with myself, which is a messy question mark.

To be very honest, this is the first time in a long time I wrote my internal thoughts, I used to do this in the past, but I guess I'm afraid people will see me as someone bitter when they used to think I'm a sweet one; while in fact I am both. Holy crap I start to think I've been living a lie and a facade. Thank goodness for this blog that I got to write a diary and let people see that, it makes me feel better.

You may or may not agree with me and my thoughts, so you're all welcome to give me your 2 cents (or more!)

“The art of writing is the art of discovering what you believe.”

—	Gustave Flaubert.

My First Beauty Box from Beauty Treats Indonesia

So the beauty box trend finally hit Indonesia, and as someone who's so easily lured by anything with surprise effect I just have to join the wagon, ha-ha... So I subscribed to the Platinum Box from Beauty Treats Indonesia.

I was supposed to receive the June box but something magical happened and I received the July Box instead, and I can't be any more thankful because it seriously filled with goods I need (and want) compared to the June box, yay!

It arrived in a cute turquoise box, with a platinum ribbon on it, weee... So cute and girly~ and when I opened it would... Look at all those silver paper~! Well, they have nothing to do with the products but still it's a nice touch, all in all, I love the packaging, good job BTI! ;)

Moving on to the products, I'm too lazy to take individual shots of each item... weee... But here's a closer and more complete look of what it contained

Woohoo~! It's pretty much my things~ I mean, eyeliners and Blush on! Totally me~! I mean, I can't leave the house without them and now I have more to add to my collection, hohoho~

Here's short reviews for each products, starting from my favorite to the least one ;)

1. Make Up For Ever HD Blush (sample size)
Mine is the warm pink one, which I absolutely love, woo hoo~! It came in sample size, which is totally understandable since they're quite pricey, haha.. but still, I think it will last a looooong time, I got five sample pack and I've tried it out yesterday. Since this is the first time I used it I applied a little bit too much (and it was only one liiiittle spot~! I swear! It's so pigmented) and I look like someone had just slapped me lol, nothing my dear holika holika compact can't fix, though. So it's all good~! Definitely a keeper!

2. Dolly Wink Pencil Eyeliner in Brown (real size)
Can never say it enough, the thing I love the most from asian cosmetics is how cute their packaging is! I mean, seriously, look at this! Here, I even steal an image from google to show you how cute this eyeliner is.

cute riiiiiighttt... the daisy doesn't even have anything to do with the eyeliner, but still it's there everywhere (on the packaging) and it makes me happy just looking at it, haha~

This one is a nice eyeliner, not as pigmented as my HG eyeliner from Holika Holika, but can be convenient when I'm looking for a more natural look. Mine came in brown color, I guess I will have a solo post comparing my (small) collections of eyeliners since it seems to be the beauty product I own the most, haha.

It's pretty waterproof, and also smudgeproof, so yeah, it's good~!

3. Smiley Perfume (sample size)
The only downside is just that this come in a sample size (LOL) because it smells nice and yeah, true to its name, it makes me all smiley and happy. It has this light scent and also a very bright packaging.

4. Koji Eyelashes (Real size)
Okay, I have to say, the only reason why this ranks fourth is simply because I am a noob in wearing faux eyelashes. Like seriously.... I need to practice more every day it seems. But compared to the previous faux eyelashes I've tried, this one feels nice. It has a pretty bold band, so it's easier to put on. Also, I love the natural look it aims, nothing too dramatic, only long lashes. If only I can use it properly, this will be on the at least third rank. lol.

5. Beauty and Bath Hand Gel (Real Size)
This smells good, and it cleans my hand in a very convenient way, plus it has a cute bear picture on it, haha.. The fragrance is a liiiiitttle bit too much somehow, though.

So yeay! Done with the review, I hope it helps you somehow. I am not as professional as those beauty bloggers, so you gotta understand me okay? Hahaha... ^3^

That's it for now, ciao~!

Guess Who's Back?

I am! Hahaha... yes, sorry dear readers for being MIA last month, not sure what I was busy about but yeah... I guess I was busy sleeping, lol.

Anyway, I am back! As an M.B.A! Kyaaah~! Can't believe I survived my Thesis Defense, that was intense and nerve-wrecking but here I am alive and well, so yay!

And guess who had just bought a ticket to Korea this autumn on impulse? Yay me! Lol, I just miss that country too much so when I saw a promo ticket to fly there I bought it in no time, even until now I still question myself, are you freaking serious? Did you just buy a ticket to Korea again? lol... oh well, I treat it as a gift to myself, kkkk~ well, so much for an excuse. I still have to take care of the Visa and stuff, so ahh... wish me luck~!

Shoutout to Maggie, who lives in Busan, and other Bloggers who's in Korea this autumn,  maybe we can meet because I took a flight to Busan airport instead of Incheon (because it's cheaper going there), plus I will need guidance around Busan, I have no idea at all about that city, hahaha...

I will only stay there for 10 days (!!! TOO SHORT!!!NOOOO... ;A;) so I've made a list of what I want to do there, including cycling on the Han River side and paying a visit to a YG building (the home of BIGBANG and 2NE1) because... idk, I think it will make my friends green with envy, lol.

And of course I will go shopping in Edae and Myeongdong, hanging out in cute little cafes in Hongdae, and visiting Artbox (and buy a whole loads of cute stationary).  Kyaahh~! Just thinking about it makes me jittery already!

I might even want to try waking up super early to watch the pre-recording of K-pop artist performing live in TV station (this one is a little bit too cheesy, but I think since 2NE1 the only Korean girl band I actually listen to- will be performing soooo... I shouldn't miss it while I'm there, no?).

This blog has seriously been too Korean-ified, lol, duh.

In another note, I've been working sooo hard to finish my drawings for a poetry book collection; I am so thankful that someone noticed me and gave me the chance to work on their books, kyaaahh~!!! So, for now, I will continue drawing again, see you again next time~! *kiss*

Ah, let me close this post with a summer song from 2NE1, I love how light and summery this song is. Quite different from 2NE1's previous tracks but still has the 2NE1 feels. Oh well, just in case you're in need of a new Korean song to listen to, here I present you 'Falling in Love' by 2NE1.