in which I no longer believe in happy ending

What? What did you say, title? littletiara doesn't believe in happy ending anymore? Look, I know it's fairytale-ish, and childish, and all the way too girly and dreamy but those are what this littletiara is (was?) like!are you kidding me? What happened to her? Did she smack her head on the wall on her sleep? (yes, many times). Did someone brainwashed her? (no chance). Was she abducted by aliens and the one writing here now is her impersonator? (is that even possible?)

See, she had been through so many heartbreaks, failure in relationships, some failures even before the relationship itself, but do you believe all those stuff will broke her bad enough to stop believing in happy ending? Because all the while she was walking on sunshine, her world was all pink and pastel and baby blue, the land she was stepping in was soft and fluffy and there were like gazilion rainbows on her sky, why the sudden change?

Oh right, because now she got to think more, she sat and contemplated on what had happened to her in this lifetime, and she realized that her question was wrongly phrased.

It should be what had she done to herself in this lifetime, and then the realization hit her; there's no such thing like happy ending.

All those colorful books, with princes and princesses in it, or all those Disney movies with their cute and happy soundtrack (she still does love the songs! YES!), oh what lies they've sprinkled there! With every stories, every single stories, ended with "and they lived happily ever after. THE END" oh yeah right, happy ending crap.

She then realized that happy endings existed only for those in the books and films, not in real life. What would you say when someone ask you "when is your happy ending?" Would you tell them it's when your boyfriend proposed to you? Or when you finally married each other? Or when you have your first child? Or when your child first goes to school? When is it exactly?

See, there's no such thing like happy ending. Life goes on, doesn't end.

I no longer believe in happy ending, instead I change it to continuous happiness, or at least trying to. Since I'm a believer of black and white, I believe that happiness exist because we can feel the sadness, that there is light because of the darkness. 

Oh well, you know what? What I'm going to do now is to be happy along the journey, to be thankful of whatever happen and enjoy everything, every single thing.

"Happiness is a journey, not a destination; happiness is to be found along the way not at the end of the road, for then the journey is over and it's too late. The time for happiness is today not tomorrow."